Monday, January 25, 2010

Between Good and Evil is only a fine line ... you can trip over anytime.


I recently met the devil. Wily fox, he was.
I took a fall into a depression so deep, it gave me dark thoughts that came right out of Hades.

Took some friends' sharp words and prayers; some supreme grace ... goodwill and encouragement to get me out of it, and those dark thoughts out of my mind.

If you ask me how I am right now, I'll say "stable ... and still fighting towards the light."

One of my really good friends and a source of encouragement, shared with me her lifelong battle against Polycystic Ovaries (PCOs), only to discover that I fought the same too.
Mine is much milder now, but was terrible some 6 years ago. I still have the occasional nausea, weight swings, and a bit of the other symptoms associated, but it's more of a benign ovarian cyst now than a PCO.

It was my refusal to dwell on it, and what became one of the fights of my life to get as far away from it as possible that helped me. I am off all treatments now, and barely suffer from it. I sympathise with my friend all the way - it's a terrible disease!

My point?
When you don't take the first step in reaching out to another, consistently, humbly, and in honesty and truth, understanding and sincerity ... you never know what COULD BE or what COULD HAVE BEEN.

We lack, as a generation, the positive principles that ought to make us more humane.

It's killing us.

On my way to church this Sunday with my father and my son, I saw again, the kind of poverty and medical depression that has made criminals, liars, manipulators, and murderers out of seemingly upright men and women of this country.

People HAVE TO BE bad to survive. HAVE TO. Period!
What kind of life is this?!

A little boy of 10 years walks the street, in poor clothes, schoolbag on his back, packed to bursting with stuff (on a Sunday morning), talking to himself. As our car passes him by, his mouth starts wobbling, and he drops his head to hide the gush of tears.
Probably thrown out by one parernt/relative and ordered back over to another parent/relative. Shuffling in between guardians and home already at this age.

Barely 100 yards away, we take a turn, and there is this full grown woman, sitting on the floor in front of a wooden kiosk, eyes bright with unshed tears, looking into the distant nothingness, moth open, and shoulders slumped in defeat.

Earlier on, an old woman, who was so frail, she couldn't have weighed more than 40kg, was begging me for money at the First Light traffic light, at Kaneshie.
"My granddaughter ... give your old mother a pesewa for thirst, won't you?" she asks.

I shake my head, unable to look her in the face ... I had nothing on me, my own last GH10 cedi spent the day before on Pampers for my son.

Surprised?
I live on faith. That's why at times, I get into the darkness. Because what sustains my son and I is nothing tangible or concrete; nothing you can touch or hold. It's all a faith in a power bigger and more potent than anything my baby and I have ever known.
And yes, I still believe that I did right in spending my savings on a society who threw it back in my face.

I have NEVER gone to bed hungry, nor have I ever been unable to see to Ayaan's needs.
Everytime it gets to that point, something comes up : a short-term contract, a rare order for my bakery/cuisine business, etc. to sustain me even while I work on the foundation, and work on growing the bakery business.
These 2 are my sworn foci, in addition to my writing, which I never leave out! Hopefully, one day I shall self-publish all my fiction and non-fiction writings. After studying under the Anyidohos and Awoonors, I owe it!!

And I refuse all fulltime job employemtn, only working on contracts. For once I take up the comfort of salaries and offices, I am sure my dreams will die.

One of my reasons for throwing my all into renewable energy was because we live in the midst of plenty - all these natural resources, and so much poverty and hardship!
We are a hospitable people, with more goodwill than most, hardworking and loving. We love life.

But we are too afraid and too lazy when it comes to grabbing life by the horns. Unfortunately, this is one situation that demands it; the only means to catapult ourselves out of this poverty into wealth.

We can do much, invest more in our skills, create more, and live better!! We can unite, and actually work together in honesty and sincerity!!

ENERGY MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND.

We need energy to power more facilities and infrastructure. These will then grow our urban areas and attract more business and development. Then will there be more jobs, which will mean less idleness, less crime, and better lifestyles.

But to get there, we must suffer a little. There are no shortcuts, and time is running out.

I HAVE STEPPED FORWARD. Will you?
Let's form a new rank of Ghanaians with the willpower to change our circumstances for the better. Because better is for all - the hardworking person as well as the hazed druggist or the hardened criminal.

And on that note, if ever a thief comes breaking into your home, or attacks you somewhere; or you see a mad person or a dazed drug addict, ask "Bruv, what happened to make you this way?"
And if they would answer you, they might probably share a tale that would prove, the only difference between you and him/her is a slightly stronger will power, or better living circumstances, or more opportunities growing up, or even just the blessing of someone to listen to your problems.

And at times, the only difference is that they have made one choice, and you are straddling the fence, hiding evil underneath your good facade. Shame on you.

Take a stand now. Save a brother, sister, child. Save Ghana.

Power to the people!

5 comments:

  1. I am sooooo glad you have a blog!
    Ok, so check this out. I'm not a big fan of Steve Jobs. However, I can relate to what you are going through.
    In addition to my word, which is, stay on track, I'll refer you to steve job's commencement speech (going around online) that talks about finding what you believe in and sticking to it. You are already a legend Golda!
    -Mike-

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  2. I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

    Alena

    http://ovarianpain.net

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  3. Heya Alena:

    Thanks, and hope it grows on you! Lol.

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  4. Nice blog my first time here...The first 2 paragraphs spoke volumes to me...thank you!

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